Wednesday, June 21, 2006

The Dan Rather Song


Dan Rather is leaving CBS news this week (HERE!) after living in an attic there since he told people the truth about George Bush's service record with faulty papers. Dan, Dan, your such a complex mess of things both good and sourly melodramatic. What a way to go! This ones' for you!!


The Dan Rather Song
by Jared Lucas Nathanson

I think we are all sorry, that you're leaving CBS,
Honestly, we thought you left in 04, I confess.
I understand your move, since they took your anchor chair away,
After 44 long years you didn't want to stay.

Growing up with you, there on the TV was sublime,
I honestly saw you as "Cronkite Junior" at one time.
You seemed so filled with passion for the news when I was ten,
When I turned twenty, you were rehearsed, like all other newsmen.

Once you lost your sincerity, for me that's when you left,
They forced you past your principles into a public death.
You cried like a baby at 9/11 and said it was honestly,
But that's not what you told the BBC.

If you'd faced this George Bush story, when you were in your prime,
America would've loved you more, they would have drawn the line.
But Dan, Republicans knew that your documents couldn't prove the case,
Carl Rove shredded the real ones back during the Texas Governor's race.

So CBS, in its new form, doesn't want you on TV,
Next to Katie Couric, you're not what they call cuddly.
If you stay, a desk is all they promise you will get,
But is it wise to trust Mark Cuban and go to HDNet?


For all your mistakes, I'll say this Dan, you really don't deserve,
To leave in shame, a footnote of when CBS lost their nerve,
Somewhere you'll always be in that green flak jacket you had,
Sometime when you're still our TV NewsDad.

So if you're really leaving, but you still want to be heard,
Cast off the sad assumptions of what modern news has learned,
And for us, be that Newsman that you were always meant to be,
You can say whatever you want, now that you are free!

And take a page from Cronkite before you're through,
He doesn't give a fuck about CBS, George Bush or you!

Goodbye Dan!!

Goodnight Boys, It's all down hill from here....

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